Most people say they’d love to be happier. However, some of what people think they need to be happy such as money and possessions are only shown to increase happiness for a short time (this study is a good example of this).
Others try exercises that many believe will make you happier. Some of these techniques are validated by scientific research. Some are not.
But few are aware that a powerful two-minute technique that’s proven to make you happier can be done to the point that it’s counterproductive.
So what is this 2-minute technique?
It’s a simple gratitude exercise.
You’ve probably heard about this kind of exercise before. One way of doing it is to merely list 3-5 things you are grateful for. But you may not have heard one simple fact about it that can allow you to get much more out of it.
Sonia Lyubomirsky, a prominent research psychologist, and her colleagues did an interesting study that shows us how to get the maximum out of our two minutes.
They had one group of people write down three things they were grateful for three times a week and another group of volunteers wrote what they were grateful for only once a week.
Most people thought that doing this exercise more often would produce more happiness.
It did not.
Those who only did the exercise once a week were much happier than those that did it three times.
The explanation.
That if you do the exercise too often, you get used to it and it no longer has as much impact on you.
So to be happier try making a weekly practice of writing down three things you are grateful for once a week. That’s all it takes to improve your happiness.
And if you really want to know why you should make happiness a top priority consider reading Barbara Fredrickson’s book Positivity. In this book, she tells you how happiness builds many of your internal resources. You become more creative, smarter, more energized, and behave better. The list goes on and on.
She also tells you a very powerful principle regarding a happiness “tipping point” that we all have. Once you get enough happiness in your life some startling things begin to happen.
I’ll tell you more about this in my next post tomorrow.
Meanwhile, will you try expressing your gratitude in writing once this week?
Consider beginning your weekly gratitude practice today by leaving me a comment about one of the things you’re grateful for below.
References:
Pursuing Happiness: The Architecture Of Sustainable Change
http://www.faculty.ucr.edu/~sonja/papers/LSS2005.pdf
Lottery Winners And Accident Victims: Is Happiness Relative?
http://education.ucsb.edu/janeconoley/ed197/documents/brickman_lotterywinnersandaccidentvictims.pdf
4 replies to "Too Much Happiness? Science Shows That Doing Too Much Of This Popular Happiness Technique Is Counterproductive"
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Wow, never knew it was like that. I’ve always just heard stuff like ‘the happier you are the better it is’.
“too much of any one good thing is a bad thing” as I like to say.
Thanks for reminding me of that.
–PK
Interesting post but I don’t really agree. I think the key word that made the difference is the word “exercise” – if you “have” to sit and write about what you’re grateful for then you probably are not really grateful for it. What happens if you a) wait and do it every week and b) only write 2-3 things you’re grateful for then you a) tend to forget some of the cool things that happened during the week that you are grateful for (even the very small things matter to the Universe) and b) by only writing 2-3 things you are stifling a lot of the good that will come to you for your gratitude.
Check out my Gratitude Journal at http://budurl.com/gratjournal – it has a sticky that sits on your desk top so you can just jot things down anytime you think of them and those notes are automatically put in the journal.
You should write frequently but it should not be a forced thing.
Thanks for writing this because the topic and discussion are very important
Terrie
Terrie,
I understand your points. One you are concerned people will forget some of the things that happned during the week so they can’t then show grattitude for them at the end of the week. And two that if writing down what they are grateful for seems “forced” it will not work as well.
As for your first point, to increase happiness a person does not need to remember all the good things that happened, just some of them (I can’t speak to your idea about the universe though).
For your second point about the exercise feeling forced, several studies have shown that most people get “gratitude fatigue” if they write daily about what they are grateful for (you may be an exception) so the exercise will be feel forced after a while. The easiest way to keep this from happening is to write less often as shown in the study quoted in this post.